Abandon All Fear

What nobody else seems to be saying…

Posts Tagged ‘solutions’

[Solutions] Unprofitable Ideas

Posted by Lex Fear on March 11, 2007

It might not be as crazy as it sounds, think about it… freedom to wait while loading/waiting, keeping traffic moving without any intervention. But wait, how would they make money then?

Posted in Absolute Power, Predatory Systems, Profiteering, Wealth Creation | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

[Solutions] Well Thought Out Concepts

Posted by Lex Fear on May 16, 2006

June 1st – Accident Free Day

That’s right, the company I work for, Politico, has come up with this brilliant idea for tackling the high level of accidents that happen in our industry. Another fine example of a managers typical ineffective response to a real problem.

I don’t know about you but when I wake up in the morning, I always intend to have an accident-free day. Is it just me or do people go to work thinking, ‘I’ll have an accident this morning, then maybe another one just before the end of my shift’?

See the problem with accidents is they’re accidents! They’re unplanned! How the hell do you go about planning an ‘accident-free day’?

Why stop at one day, why don’t we just declare an ‘Accident Free Day’ everyday of the year? We’d save a heck of a lot of money on insurance and perhaps we’d be able to do away with all those premiums altogether!

Politico Employee Survey

Apparently we are one of the top organisations in the country. It’s all down to this cleverly worded employee survey they put out a few months ago. Some of the responses included:

  • 89% of you feel you have a secure future at the company. Meaning: I will not be promoted and I have no hope of finding a job elsewhere.
  • 81% of you value the help that training provides. Meaning: If we were provided training it would be a help us do our jobs properly, rather than just relying on finding someone who knows how to do something.
  • 79% of you feel fully involved in the company. Meaning: They call my mobile if I’m on holiday.
  • 75% of you would recommend Politico to others as an employer… to avoid.

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Posted in Anecdotes, Ha-has, Propaganda, Uncircumcised Philistines | Tagged: , , , , , | Leave a Comment »