Abandon All Fear

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Archive for January 31st, 2008

[Spam Poetry] Love That Comes To Late

Posted by Lex Fear on January 31, 2008

I don’t know whether it was boredom or procrastination or a mixture of both but I find myself reading some of my spam and have started to find it highly entertaining!

For example there’s the President of the Central Bank of Nigeria and his associates always emailing to keep me updated on my investments. I’ve invested so much money I’m going to be a gazillionaire by the time the cheques clear. Any day now they say.

Then there’s the the lonely girls. They’re always emailing me as soon as they spot my profile on the tubes. Too bad I’m married but that doesn’t stop them inviting me to their websites for a chat. One problem though… my penis is too small… apparently. I thought I was an average guy but to them it’s clear I need to substantially enlarge the volume of my ‘male meat’, ‘supersize’ my willy and get a Huge! in my pants.

But has anyone noticed how artsy some spam emails are getting these days? Sometimes they don’t even contain a link, just a garbled message in pidgen English or similar dialect. It’s as though spam is evolving a culture. So I thought I’d begin sharing some of the more evocative ones and see how it goes.

Ladies and Gentlemen I give you…

Love That Comes To Late

Love that comes to late like a
Then we shall have a match.

Lucas Sheffield

Feel free to leave some artsy witicism in the comments…

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